The Sublime and Spirited Voyage of Original Sin by Colette Moody (2009)

Four words: lesbian pirate romance novel

THE PLOT

When Captain "Madman" Malvern of the Original Sin is wounded in a battle, his daughter Gayle send members of the crew to fetch a doctor from the nearest town. However, the flatulent and cowardly doctor hides in his room and lets the pirates instead take his fiancee, Celia Pierce, the town seamstress. Once aboard the pirate ship, Celia uses her mad sewing skillz to stitch up the Captain and the other wounded crewmen. Gayle tells Celia she will return her home after they deposit her father in New Providence to convalesce and stock up on provisions. But in the streets of New Providence, an old gypsy woman reads Celia’s palm and tells her that she must not marry her fiance, but endure many trials and seek her true love. Part of the gypsy’s cryptic clues as to what the trials may be – “A fallen woman abducted by seven sisters” – makes itself known when a doctor offers Gayle his services aboard her ship if they help him retrieve his kidnapped sister. Celia opts for adventure and stays aboard the Original Sin. After they rescue the doctor’s sister from a randy slaver – the doctor’s sister herself an oversexed lesbian – they return to New Providence where a recuperating but permanently disabled Captain Malvern informs the crew he is retiring from piracy and sends them off with instructions on how to retrieve his hidden hoard of swag. Meanwhile, Celia’s father contracts a rapscallion by the name of Captain Fuks to find and deliver his daughter. Fuks gets wind of Malvern’s hoard, ambushes the crew, and steals the gold. The Original Sin goes after him and regains the booty. They all live happily ever after. Oh, and while all of that is going on, Celia and Gayle become lovers.

MY TAKE

This book is different from other pirate romance novels I have read – and not just because it isn’t heterocentric. It is much heavier on the action and adventure. The plot is engaging and well-paced, and there are a number cool fight scenes, which, believe it or not, is unusual for the genre. In fact, I might be tempted to say that the book is not of the romance genre. But it is. It follows the same structure: Kidnapping -> sexual tension -> sexual fulfillment -> outside conflict -> resolution. What is refreshing, however, is that it does not follow the same tropes. For starters, Celia is, as Gayle puts it, a “most agreeable hostage.” She was bored at home, and didn’t care much for her no-good fiance. She wanted adventure and here it was. Secondly, Celia is intrigued and interested by Gayle’s advances from the start. There is no objection for the sake of modesty or decorum – rather, Celia is reluctant because she doesn’t want to be just one of Gayle’s many conquests.

Additionally, the book is really funny. Moody doesn't try to keep to the parlance of the time, which usually comes off as awkward rather than authentic. She has clearly done her research on proper sailing terminology and practices, but the writing style is very contemporary. Whereas many writers seem to phone in the ubiquitous witty repartee, Moody's dialog is *actually* witty. For example, when Celia is relating her voyage to her father, he storms at Gayle,

"Is there anyone on board you haven't ruined?"

"I haven't ruined anyone but your daughter," she spat back. There was a palpable silence. "Wait a moment, allow me to rephrase that." - page 189

Funny, right?

There are a number of supporting characters, some more fleshed-out than others. Even though they are not all three-dimensional, their traits are specific enough that they don't fall into cliche. The villains are antic - slavers, rapists, buffoons, and pedophiles. But they somehow avoid being just caricatures. Moody gives maybe a line or so of characterization to about half a dozen of the crew members. I couldn't really keep them straight. It isn't a lot of detail that she gives, and it didn't add any personality to the characters, but the presence of the detail gave depth to the world nonetheless. It also made it seem more bold when some of these crew men get killed. Even in books where the crew is totally nameless, they usually don't get killed. The one supporting character who is a stand-out is Molly, a new recruit who was kicked off her previous vessel when they discovered she was a woman. She describes herself as "a bloody good sailor" who can fight "like a fuckin' she-beast. She wins a farting contest among the crew. She flashes her tits at the doctor, who she later fucks, and whose life she later saves. I like Molly.

THE HEROINE

Gayle is smart, funny, and a capable pirate captain. Oftentimes the pirate captains in these novels have ruthless reputations, but actually possess hearts of gold. Gayle admits that most of the stories about pirates are not true, but that they are indeed dangerous people. She herself is a skilled fighter and kills several people. It helps that the pirates she kills are particularly vile, but that seems to be mostly to help placate Celia's shock and horror. It is pretty clear that Gayle would kill some of these people regardless of their moral character. As with the pirate captains in many of (more recent) novels, Gayle avers that when it comes to sex, she takes only “what is freely offered.” But she doesn’t do the whole arrogant I’m-not-going-to-have-sex-with-you-until-you-beg-for-it thing. Her attraction to Celia manifests itself as assertive but unaggressive flirtation. No manipulation. No seduction.

THE OTHER HEROINE

Celia is adventurous and has a wry sense of humor. Her thought processes ring true. She has a believable balance of admiration for and fear of the pirates in whose company she finds herself. She is athletic and adventurous. Many authors seem to limit their heroine’s personality to what they think a woman might have been like in that time period. Moody doesn’t. And although it is unlikely that one could find a wise-ass woman in the 1700s, I can’t seem to care. The fact that Celia (and other characters) sometimes talks and acts in an anachronistic manner doesn’t bother me. It doesn’t take me out of the time and place because the character seems so natural and relatable, and because Moody takes care to detail the setting accurately where it counts.

THE SEX

Celia and Gayle’s relationship develops organically from spending time together. (Just like it happens in real life!) As such, it’s a pretty slow build to the sex. (Just like it happens in real life! Er, sometimes.) There aren’t very many sex scenes, but I didn’t find myself flipping ahead to see how long until the next one, as has happened to me before, because I was invested in the plot. But what’s great about the sex scenes is that they feel in-character and reciprocal:

Gayle's nude body over hers inflamed her, and she couldn't get enough of the taste of her lips. She began to grind against Gayle's hand, and her legs opened wider.

"Do you feel it building, dear?" Gayle whispered. Celia would only nod as she closed her eyes, her body surging with need. "I can feel your hunger. You're aching, aren't you?"

Celia answered with a loud moan, so Gayle concentrated on Celia's clitoris, her mouth moving back down to one of her full breasts. The motion of her tongue on Celia's nipple mirrored the motion of her fingertips, which Celia liked tremendously. - page 137

Sure, the dialog is kind of cheesy, but...clitoris! I don’t think I’ve ever seen “clitoris” in a romance novel! I also like the “which Celia liked tremendously” line because it means that rather than just describing the actions that are taking place and presuming they’re hot, we know that Celia *likes* it.

Here’s another one:

"Tell me what to do."

"I need you, here," Gayle answered, placing Celia's hand precisely where she wanted it. "Stroke me, love."

Celia complied, and the feel of her lover's arousal was powerfully provocative. Gayle kept her hand on top of Celia's, and Celia watched as Gayle's body began to writhe in pleasure. Remembering how incredible she had felt in the same position, she kissed Gayle's breast and traced the nipple sensuously with her tongue.

Gayle moaned and thrust her breast eagerly toward her, clearly wanting Celia to somehow take all of it into her mouth. "My love," she said, pulling Celia's hand away.

"What is it?"

"I need your mouth on me. Your beautifully skilled mouth."

Celia was caught off guard by the request, but the thought of making love to Gayle and potentially bringing her the same type of ecstasy she had just experienced kept her from hesitating. She moved down Gayle's trembling body and began to kiss Gayle's vulva, noticing how her tongue sent tiny tremors through her body. Slowly, she became more confident as her lover's hips began to rock against her mouth. Celia loved both her seductive movements and her passionate taste.

Again, kind of cheesy dialog, but...vulva! I’ve *definitely* never seen “vulva” in a romance novel. The rare times that I have encountered cunnilingus in a romance novel, they relied on euphemism and implication. There was no description.

The other cool thing about their relationship is how egalitarian it is. Gayle is the pirate captain and the more experienced lover, but she doesn't have more power than Celia (except to command the crew, of course). There isn't a "butch" and a "femme." They're both people with many traits. Neither is markedly more "feminine" than the other.

THE PIRACY

Lots of great pirate detail in this one. Moody did her homework most thoroughly. She includes two pirate-y foods - salmagundi, and boucan stew. "Boucan" being where the term "buccaneer" comes from. In one battle, the crew hides while Gayle and Celia stand on the deck in dresses to lure a ship to them. This is a historically documented tactic. Molly's character may have been inspired by Mary Read, who sailed on a pirate ship dressed as a boy. Most impressively, Gayle makes mention of the earthquake that struck Port Royal in 1692. Yup, that happened. I suppose it would be difficult to have a pirate romance novel in which the pirate captain does not have his or her own quarters, something that pirate captains didn't make use of. But where most books describe a large, lavish room with a big soft bed and a mahogany desk, the captain's quarters on Original Sin is much more modest.

MY RATING

Misogyny: 0/5 stars
Bawdy humor: 4/5 stars
Anatomical names for body parts: Vulva/5 stars
Overall: 4.5/5 stars